Saturday, March 28, 2009

Who loses a king size mattress...

On South Bound I-45 at 9 PM in the evening? That would be me!

A good friend of ours was gracious enough to let us borrow her king size mattress and box springs as they are very expensive and we already have so many other expenses with the new house and all. I was so excited because the rest of our furniture came in today and I wanted to surprise the hubster.

The plan was to go pick up the mattress on the sly and get it back to the house and set it all up. Well, the first part worked out, not so much the last part. I got to my friends house and loaded up the mattress. We started heading from her place in Willis down to our place in Shenandoah. Apparently we didn't get far. As soon as got onto the freeway and picked up speed to the speed limit. The mattress was gone (box springs were fine btw)!

I am borrowing my dad's truck and it is such a smooth ride I didn't even feel it. I couldn't see it either because my back window was blocked by all the stuff in the cab. My friend was following me with one of her friends. They both did not see it until they passed it up. Even my friend didn't see it, her friend did (she thought he was crazy).

Well both trucks turned around and started our search and rescue mission. We were all concerned for the safety and well being of our fellow drivers as well as the mattress not being damaged. When we went back (not even 5 minutes had passed) the mattress was GONE! Almost as if it never was there. We drove past so many times and we saw no trace.

I'm not going to be angry or upset about this situation because really it is laughable. Who loses a king size bed on the freeway? Will I laugh about this story 10 years from now? Absolutely, I'm laughing right now as a matter of fact. It was an unforseeable event that occured and was unavoidable. No use in crying over spilled milk.

Don't get me wrong, do we need the extra expense of a new mattress? No, but obviously someone saw the mattress on the road and picked it up. They probably needed it more than we did anyway. I hope it blesses them.

It's funny how you view things through a new life perspective. It makes the bad stuff not seem so bad and the random crisis seem funny. It's all in your response. Are you going to sweat it out until you have a nervous breakdown, heart attack, or stroke? No, absolutely not! I know who my provider is and He is the only one who knows what is next for me and mine. I think I will stand in His line!

Monday, March 23, 2009

On the topic of revenge...

I was whole heartedly convicted at church yesterday. We are learning about Revelation and the End Times. The sermon led to the topic of offense, revenge and forgiveness. I was so moved I cried.

I hate to say it, but I do find myself plotting "I'll show them" moments on occassion. It is hard to admit, but I do. I despise that about myself. I think it all started with my stubborn attitude when I was little. When someone would tell me "you can't do that," my famous phrase would pop up "I'll show you!". I never thought about it as revenge, but it is. Even if it is something great we are going to accomplish, it is still a revengeful attitude.

The whole thing is about changing your attitude towards people and situations. If we are doing something good out of bad motivations, that makes what we are doing null and void. We need to do things out of the GOODNESS of our heart and not to PROVE A POINT!

Romans 12:19: Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge; I will repay," says the Lord.
Revenge is God's. Not ours. If we take up the offense we end up looking like the fool. If we put it in God's hands where it belongs, he can vindicate and fight for us better than we ever could.

I literally struggle with this daily. I have a few people in my life that I want to just shake and say "how can you give me an unfair judgement! You don't even know me!" I have not done this though I really want to. But I have not fully given the offense to God. I have to a measure, and I have been given a measure of favor in return. If I give it all to God he will make it good. Because he works all things for good!

Words to live by: Romans 12:20-21
On the contrary: "If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head." Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

I know I need to start checking my motivations and also discern the motivations of others. I will be continually praying this into my life because I do want to love and do good things, but with a clean and pure heart. Not a heart that wants to "show them" how good I can be.

Friday, March 20, 2009

Mission Statement

This is not so much a real mission statement as an update to individual missions God has placed on the hearts of those around me.

Today is a powerful day! Do you feel it in the air? I know I do!

I want to start off by saying that God gives people areas where he wants each of us to minister, whether to a group, individual, intercession for something on His heart, etc. I know my mission and it is to minister to people on an individual level and I praise God for this! This may not last forever he may call me to intercession for world events or call me to minister to groups. I'm waiting on his direction, but this is where he has planted me so far.

I have been called to minister to a specific individual and we have been good friends for years now. She has a plethora (sp?) of medical issues and I went with her a few weeks ago when she had to call the on call doctor at her doctors office to come in on a Saturday. He was quick, efficient, and seemed to genuinely want to get to the bottom of things. We left the office and I looked at her and said, "that's your new doctor." Her other doctors were not helping her and this guy took time away from his family to be there to help her and not just "patch her up" and send her on her way. He really wanted to find the problem and address it.

She went in for her checkup today, with this new doctor, and she got to minister to him! He has a deep hurt from losing his 4 year old daughter a few years ago. She drowned in their swimming pool. He told her he is angry at God and doesn't know how to fix that. She looked him in his tearfilled eyes as he was confessing these things unsolicited and she told him, "God gave up his child too." She told him this to remind him that God knows that pain all too well and he empothizes! She called to tell me how it all went and I had to rejoice! I praise God that she is picking up her missions as well.

My dear husband is at a funeral today for a good friend's father. He was a wonderful, well loved, and well lived man. He struggled with cancer for a few years and the Lord called him home. I believe my husbands presence is ministering to the family and is also being ministered to in return. I continue to pray for the family because losing a loved one is difficult.

I feel so renewed today because of all of this! Praise God for His swiftly moving hand throughout our lives!

Sunday, March 1, 2009

The Windows to the Soul...

Psalm 27:4One thing I ask of the LORD, this is what I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to seek him in his temple.

God revealed himself to me in a very powerful way today at church. I have been going to this church for over a year now and have strongly felt that I was called to this church along with my husband.

For the past year I have felt a slight disconnect with the other members. I didn't feel like I belonged, like I was not worthy of joining this fellowship. I have felt that my husband fit in perfectly, but not me for some reason. I thought I was still too "bad" to be allowed to operate fully at the church. And it was my own insecurities and the lies the enemy has planted. Never the less, I felt the seperation.

I did not want to feel the seperation. I wanted to feel like I belonged, that there was a place for me there. I went to church this morning not expecting a change in my feelings, but there was one. A HUGE one!

When I walked through the doors, the air was different. I taught my Sunday school class and they responded to the lesson more than they ever have (not that the kids are unruly in any way, because they are 99% of the time little angels!).

I got into the sanctuary for worship time and it was like God had removed this film over my eyes and I could see clearly for the first time. I looked around the room and everyone was so beautiful! It's like they were all glowing from the inside out. I was just stunned at the beauty of God flowing from every single person! I would look into their eyes and I literally saw God starring back at me. I cannot describe how amazing that felt.

At that moment, I felt the connection. Whatever was holding me back, no longer was there. It was removed and I loved every single person, member or visitor, it didn't matter. I was part of something bigger. It was something that I felt was missing and now was found! I was connected to all these amazingly wonderful people through Jesus Christ!

I was marvelling at his beauty. I saw his beauty in the way a child touched his mother's hair. I saw his beauty in the sincerity in which the worship leader sang. I was literally awestruck and dumbfounded. I'm surprised I can even put it into words (very poorly I might add) right now. I could never find the exact words to describe God's beauty.

I sat amazed. Then our awesome pastor stepped forward and asked for people to come up and tell about how they feel God is beautiful. I was amazed yet again. But I still could not find the words. I did not go forward, because I could not even voice it till after church was over for hours. I think God had shown me a glimpse of his love for everyone and it was a private revelation at the moment. I think he was trying to break those insecurities off of me by showing me his amazing grace.

I stand before you all now a free woman. I am released from those shackles that held me down for so long. I no longer need to worry and fret over who does and does not like me or whether I should have not said something at the risk of sounding silly. He came and healed that part of me today and I know it will be a fight to keep those old wounds from coming back, but I know this part of my life is over. PRAISE GOD!